Okay, so on the collaboration vlog I do, we’ve got 32 subscribers, which means that there are hypothetically 25 people out there who watch our videos regularly who aren’t us.  I think this is cause for celebration :D  Oh, and here’s my most recent vlog:

Hope you enjoyed it

:D

So it’s been quite a long time since I’ve written anything, and I feel particularly bad about it since I keep saying that I’ll be coming back with writing.  But it’s okay, because I’ve been failing at just about every count of life. 

I haven’t been able to write much, and the stuff that I have written I wouldn’t show anyone [it scares me more than it would scare you, but I'm still not all that comfortable with it yet].

I finished Middlesex.  It was really good, though the last parts of the book seemed exceedingly unrealistic.  I’d still recommend it, though.  The narrator is really interesting, and the character’s change is amazing.

I’m half way through Harry Potter 4 for the third or fourth time.  It’s good, duh.

I’ve been spending less time online.  Less time on YouTube and Facebook and the Ning.  It shouldn’t concern me, I should think it’s a good thing, but I’m afraid that when I get back to RL I won’t really have the I.  I’ll just be watching.  After experiencing such a year of true internet addiction, I’m kind of starting to notice what an effect it’s had on me.  People don’t really know me the way I thought they did, nor do they identify with me in the same way.  They always talk of having no time but I don’t believe them.  They could have time if they wanted to; if they tried hard enough.  Maybe it’s all just an excuse to not talk to me.

And that’s really what it all comes down to.  I haven’t spoken to many people, mostly just the same ones over and over.  I’m losing touch with the people who matter most to me and I’m realizing, as if for the first time, that they never really cared, even though it’s always crossed my mind.  But now it’s hitting, and it’s hitting kind of hard.  It’ll take work to not feel the compulsion to talk to people who want nothing to do with me.  I’m terrified of it; have been for years.  More than ever I miss school.  At least it kept me busy and my mind occupied.  The routine was nice.  It was constant.  When things were out of wack I could worry about them and TELL someone I was worrying.  During the school year, you know for sure that you’re going to see people again.  The summer never grants these positives. 

So I guess I’ll just spend the next few weeks waiting for Stanford.  Hopefully that will give me the routine that I need to keep my mind going and keep my attention off of the people that I care about more than anything in the world.  Maybe it will make this change hurt a bit less, but I don’t think it will.  I feel like this change has been going non-stop since I graduated elementary school, a whole five years ago.  I’m still trying to find a good crowd, a  great group of people who share my interests and obsessions.  We’ll see what happens.

And yeah, this will still end with a smile.

:D

I’ll admit it. I definitely didn’t post on Sunday because I haven’t really written much this week, but I’m going to take this time to blame it on finals. So there’s good news coming today . . . I FINISHED MY LAST MAJOR FINALS!!!! Okay, so I have health on Friday, but who counts health? Science didn’t go as well as I hoped, but math was really good. And history and Spanish were yesterday, so it’s all good :D

And tomorrow I’m getting tickets for . . . drumroll, please . . . TITLE OF SHOW!!! Me and Evan are going to the opening day extravaganza, and I’m sooo excited about it. It’s going to be a lot of fun, and I promise I’ll post video on shutupandsmile18.

I can’t think of much else to talk about . . . except for the fact that I’ve already got three questions to answer on my vlog on Thursday and I keep thinking that today is Wednesday even though it most definitely isn’t.

And I miss English class :/ A lot. A LOT a lot.

But, I’m going to iHop for dinner tonight, so I guess all isn’t that bad.

:D

Yay for 600 views; achieved yesterday (or the day before).

There’s nothing else to say about this.

Big-ish writing post coming at you tomorrow.

:D

[More old poetry]

The white beard that isn’t really white
It’s a charcoal gray
Wirey without fluff
The cheeks not red
Like they’re supposed to be
Actually a little green
‘Cause he doesn’t like
to fly
But he does
anyway
And ’cause of that
the jolly is gone.

[Another old poem]

I. Have. A.
Bird.
Named.
Rocky. Rocky
flies; through the air
Around a house. And
into my room, again. This time
with a message.
Not for me.
But. For. My. Other.
Bird.
Bullwinkle.

[I wrote this poem last year]

Dear stranger,
You are not so strange to me
I have noticed you
Watched you
I have written you down on paper.
You probably do not notice me.
I hear you
I interpret your face, your eyes, your clothes
Your life.
You do not notice me.
We pass every day, stranger.
Maybe once or twice your glance has
Met mine?
Have you ever wondered
What I think?
What I do?
I have done this, for you.
I find you interesting, stranger
You make me think.
About your history
Important dates
Memories.
This is who I am
But I long to know, who are you?
Are you like me?
An observer too?

Okay, so I know I haven’t written in a while, and I’M SORRY!! I both have been really busy and havn’t had much to say. So now I have a lot to say, and I’m still very busy.

1. I don’t remember how many books I’ve read since my last book review series, but I know that I hadn’t read Paper Towns. It’s the new book by John Green, which I got an advanced readers copy of, because I’m special. I’ll be honest: I had high expectations, even though I wasn’t sure what to expect. Looking for Alaska (his first book) is probably my favorite book of all time, whereas An Abundance of Katherines (his second book) wasn’t all *that* special to me (though it did have some killer math equations). There’s been a lot of hype about this book, a lot of excitement, and lots of talk about a certain Margo Roth Speigleman (the important female). I read the book in about a day. It was interesting, but I definitely didn’t like it more than Looking for Alaska. And, for the record, I really, really, really didn’t like Margo’s character. She reminded me a lot of Alaska, but way more extreme in all the wrong ways. I feel like I can’t say more until the book comes out, so I’ll stop here. I give it four out of five stars.

2. FINALS SUCK. I just handed in my history/community service final. I only got three hours of sleep last night (I was lucky I got that), which is the least amount of sleep I’ve ever gotten . . . ever. On the other hand, I just got back my math project and I got a 101%, which made me really happy.

3. I’ve decided that I’m making a bunch of new resolutions for the rest of . . . for now. First rule: I’m going to write a page every single day. It’ll be double spaced, Tahoma size 10. Second rule: Every Sunday I will update this blog with the writing I’ve done throughout the week. Third rule: All of my 7awesomenerdfighter videos will be posted every Thursday here (although you could just subscribe at http://www.youtube.com/7awesomenerdfighter). Fourth rule: I will do a normal blog post about life and such every Tuesday. Every other week I think I’m going to find an interesting news article or some sort of cool question to talk about.

4. So today I got to do something very special: I went with my history teacher and like twenty other kids to the ABC studios (a quick walk from my school) and we got to do a test for this product. We got free cookies and brownies and soda and got to watch this news segment thing and had to rate it and write what we liked and what we didn’t like about the nine different segements, and then rank which ones were our favorite. Then we got to meet the guy who was in all of the segments and ask him questions, and then we got to the really super cool part: we got to tour ABC studios. We went into the control room and learned all about what all the different TV moniters show and what all the different buttons do. Then we got to walk past the studio where some woman was doing a crossword puzzle at the big news desk and we passed by some HD cameras that were so amazing it was ridiculous. We passed Charles Gibson, who said a quick hello before running off somewhere. It was a LOT of fun.

5. Spanish and English finals tomorrow. Have I mentioned how much I HATE FINALS!!!???

6. I have nothing more to say.

:D

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